this desperation's leaving me overjoyed

please understand,
this isn't just goodbye,
this is i can't stand you.

do you ever wonder how your favourite artists manage to write such amazing lyrics? i've been listening to no it isn't by (+44) lately 'cause it's been stuck in my head - along with bleeding love by leona lewis...yeah, random i know - and i realized that both songs have very powerful lyrics. the only difference in them is that mark hoppus - the singer and bassist of (+44) - wrote the lyrics himself, while bleeding love was written by jesse mccartney and onerepublic's ryan tedder.
honestly, writing a song is probably one of the hardest things i've ever tried to do. i find it harder than writing an academic essay. at least with essays you can bullshit and you can make it look good by copying and pasting - well not so much when you're in post-secondary but you catch my drift - but if you bullshit in a song it won't sound good. the key to finding good lyrics is finding words that fit with the music itself, which is very, very difficult to do - at least for me. you've got lyrics with simple words that speak in volumes like the beatles' yesterday and coldplay's yellow, and then you've got the songs with lyrics that can be read like a short story, like guernica by brand new and the district sleeps alone tonight by the postal service. both types of songs are amazing not only because they sound good but the lyrics fit so well with it - it's a perfect combination. why can't i write like that?! usually lyrics are written from experience or from something that the songwriter invisions in their head, but i really don't have anything interesting from my experience to turn into a song, and i'm not creative enough to think up of scenarios in my head to draw poetic words from. sigh. oh well.
i'll just write instrumentals. haha.

where fears and lies melt away

"thinking of you, wherever you are. we pray for our sorrows to end, and hope that our hearts will blend. now i will step forward to realize this wish, and who knows; starting a new journey may not be so hard, or maybe it has already begun. there are many worlds, but they share the same sky - one sky, one destiny."

i really despise the fact that the ending to kingdom hearts II has the ultimately rare ability to make me teary-eyed. don't worry, i didn't cry - now THAT would've made me look like a puss. i hate it when things happen like that; when you watch something so touching that it makes you happy and sad at the same time, and the feeling swells inside you to the point where it's so overwhelming that you can't help but cry about it - or in my case, get all teary-eyed. there are very few things in the world that can drive me to near-tears, and the ending to kingdom hearts II has just done that. mind you, this is probably the 583498234th time i've beaten the game, but this is the first time i've beaten it in a couple of years, so the impact is almost as strong as it was the first time i've beaten it.
anyway, skipping most of the nerd talk, the ending mostly spoke about the strength of the heart, and friendship and all that cheesy hullabaloo, and it got me thinking, like most things do. can the heart be seen as a weapon?
think of it like this: our emotions apparently stem from the heart. happiness, sorrow, fear, anger, all of those things come from the heart. when we hurt others by saying mean things or doing mean things, wouldn't we be channeling that spite through our hearts, since 'meanness' is an emotion?
i find it strange how there are people out there who try to research things that are obviously out of our control, like the workings of the heart and mind. how do you diagnose a mental illness? how do you know if that person is really insane or not? how do you nurse a broken heart? is it so simple to just pick up the shards and piece them back together? being the dominating species of this planet we try to take control over everything, including ourselves, but sometimes it's just not possible to be the boss of everything. the human heart is unpredictable, just as the human mind is. you can't choose who you fall in love with, or what your likes and dislikes are. you can't choose your mental capacity just as you can't choose who your enemies should be. i guess the idea of being in control is comforting to some people, which is why they go great lengths to do so. it still doesn't make any sense to me.